A good word, and describes how I feel about blogging:

Main Entry: am·biv·a·lence
Pronunciation: am-'bi-v&-l&n(t)s
Function: noun
Etymology: International Scientific Vocabulary
Date: 1918
1 : simultaneous and contradictory attitudes or feelings (as attraction and repulsion) toward an object, person, or action
2 a : continual fluctuation (as between one thing and its opposite) b : uncertainty as to which approach to follow
- am·biv·a·lent /-l&nt/ adjective
- am·biv·a·lent·ly adverb